A man with a prong on his nose

The Spoonbill Generator

The Spoonbill Generator Archive

A Golden Treasury of Collaborative Verse, 1996–2007


Poems by Year: 1996 - 1997 - 1998 - 1999 - 2000 - 2001 - 2002 - 2003 - 2004 - 2005 - 2006 - 2007

*** Hall of Fame  — Alphabetical List of Titles  — Index of First Lines  — Poems by Colour

Poems completed in 1999

Title

First line

Poems open in a new window

January
1999 Jan 3Hell FruitIf you think that I'm the reject, then I'll thrash you till you're blue
1999 Jan 5Clouds In Angelic UnderclothingSwing down sweet cherubs and lie with me
1999 Jan 5Cherubic Implant in My SuccubusLazy day, bowl o' porridge before me
1999 Jan 7Brain Pump OutletLouder than a hill of cheese
1999 Jan 7All But ThereThere's a THERE there all right
1999 Jan 7Trip, 15th August 1812The sun had scarcely risen when we started down the lane
1999 Jan 10Thumbscrews This TimeWhen your boots are filled with brandy
1999 Jan 11Tales for the Dogmatical NursemaidThe unicorn, though custom deems it myth,
1999 Jan 11Cyber-PogromGive me a goat and a piece of old rope and I walk right along to the fair
1999 Jan 13Unending MitigationRemind me to unwind the clock
1999 Jan 18Is of NightThe smiles I get when I dance around the bar
***1999 Jan 18When We Reconsider All Our FootstepsMy grandmother told me on one grand occasion
1999 Jan 20When We Were ProteinsIn the warm air
***1999 Jan 21Only Transient SheepHiatus and Hibiscus are the names of my two sheep
1999 Jan 22These Fiscal CousinsQuarters
1999 Jan 22Zen CatfoodCalm throat fortune
1999 Jan 24Music Shadows RepetitivelyAn amphora of Egyptian darkness
1999 Jan 25Very East NinevehBy dint of subtle mime
1999 Jan 25Sensible NosesA small crimson telephone quivers
1999 Jan 26SeedsThe seeds of gourds shook,shook,shook!
1999 Jan 26Walk, don't sniffle and you won't get itWhen I was walking this I saw:
1999 Jan 28Continental HeadTime and again I'm obliged to remark
1999 Jan 30Earth TelegramA shrew without wings
1999 Jan 31Her DaymareOn the far side of the beach: abyss

February
1999 Feb 2Ferdinand's ElmA grey seal, with grace of an eel
1999 Feb 2Endless Power, Our Sole AccomplishmentInflamed with paranoia
1999 Feb 3Tenacious LoipA harsh law, or an honest law?
1999 Feb 4My Earliest Barnacle-Busting MemoryCount to ten, then start again
1999 Feb 8Crepuscular CreationI was excreted through a pore
1999 Feb 8The Helicopter's PlenitudeTriceratops, my maiden aunt
1999 Feb 8Quantum Snork Sput SnootingWell bless my soul and clean my boots! I've started a new stanza
1999 Feb 8From...At the end of my tether I fastened a kite
***1999 Feb 9The Lewd Mouths SquealCarnivores, despite the laws
1999 Feb 11Spin FriarThe Lady's not for burning
1999 Feb 11BlemishesI never saw a clean sweep
1999 Feb 13Squeamish, Mother?Toothpaste is a substance that I readily ingest
1999 Feb 15Forever StrontiumPlug me in a catheter if there are any left
1999 Feb 20Naked GlobeRosemary...comfrey... cammomile tea,
1999 Feb 21Crystal All AlongDying in Luxor with the Spoonbill chill
1999 Feb 22Never Knowingly CharmedUnskilled workers toil wordlessly
1999 Feb 28How Death Became MoonshineMy tribal ways

March
1999 Mar 1Colditz RhythmHellespont and Hecuba were walking down the street
1999 Mar 2It never happened really except once maybe yesterdayThe night was dark, and dire foreboding crackled in the air
1999 Mar 6Opacity's 22 Miraculous BeingsSilent in the midnight silence
1999 Mar 6Sugared Death WatchingA simple thought occured today, entirely on its' own
1999 Mar 7Nubility OneThe death's-head watched and waited,
1999 Mar 8Blamirog's Prophetic LandfallBlamirog was wondering about the Blessed Isle
1999 Mar 10Seal CobblersNow, children, gather round, and I will tell you of Old Tom
1999 Mar 12Therapists KillHenrietta ate a cake
***1999 Mar 20The Ballad of Archibald SidewaysThe Ballad of Archibald Sideways
1999 Mar 20Cessations in Cocktail-WaitressingCatastrophe has happened on a scale that Pride forbids
1999 Mar 23My Boatswain's Left BaboonA third knee is a mighty boon
1999 Mar 23An Entropic EncroachmentAs we waited for the bus to mow the wicked postman down
1999 Mar 28Who Desecrates the Vector?Make a portrait of King George upon the very sod

April
1999 Apr 4A Dire TendernessNever deny that I warned you
1999 Apr 4Homer RetranslatedConversations are a winding down of time for most,
1999 Apr 5The Leather Ambulance CrumblesBy dint of subtle mime
1999 Apr 7This Pinteresque PortionWeasels ripped my heart out
1999 Apr 9Neoplastic Ha'pennyMy parachute has broken and I don't know how to fall
1999 Apr 9Easter GreetingsResurrection!
1999 Apr 13Uncivil ArcadeGushing geysers greet the dwan with foam and spume and spray
1999 Apr 15Uncle Gomez's Dinosaur EggsAcres of acrid slime do not make a garden
1999 Apr 16A Bergsonian Lullaby For CatsCowboy and Chabot are on the go!
1999 Apr 20Canterbury NemesisPetulant pilgrims don't like to eat rope
1999 Apr 23Wizened Thoughts for Yesterdays' LeakTesseracts were falling as if falling were the rage
1999 Apr 24Unwound wherries aloftCalesthenic interprobes are launched into the Sun
1999 Apr 24Romeo's Disagreeable Collapsible Peregrinations'Festival of shouting!', so barked the trusty swain
1999 Apr 26Handel's Balletic HymenVirginal scrapings are like unto gold

May
1999 May 7The Unseen ChillThe 'Spoonbill Chill' hung over the land
1999 May 8Major Karamazov's On CallCooler than the outer wall
1999 May 14Vulva buoyGive me a coin and pass by
1999 May 17Anthem of Unfinished ToenailsIt's best to smile
1999 May 18Further from the Beatiful FootThe rate of completion increases
1999 May 23While I'm Devoid of SyntaxSlowly, slowly crept the maddened fox
1999 May 26Warriors from EternityI wandered lonely as a nerd
1999 May 30Zinc Oxide AlarumWhen Hydrogen confounded Zinc

June
1999 Jun 5Celibate Coinage in Whitechapel LanePoem composition is a task the world adores
1999 Jun 11Wetness, Damp Socks, and PrawnsAlthough our raft is still marooned
1999 Jun 17Remember My Helicopter?Never in the history of this our Mother Earth
1999 Jun 21Fracturating Kippers: This Homophonic HarmoniumMeet my typing-tutor
1999 Jun 28Midsummer Fails EveryoneMellow jazz oozes from the speakers
1999 Jun 29Atmos the FerricTick Tock...Boing!

July
1999 Jul 5Unpleasant LacunaTo line our wombs with chemicals
1999 Jul 18My Slapdash EndgameA Cautionary Tale

August
***1999 Aug 4QuiteWhy, oh why, oh why, oh why?
1999 Aug 6For My Bunny Rabbit'Give me back my arquebus!', cried Randolph Great the Third
***1999 Aug 17Deathrow Welshmen Sometimes TickHas time stopped?
1999 Aug 20The Etiquette of Hogwash CountryOnce upon a golden morn
1999 Aug 23Full Confession for the TitansPay up! Pay up! It's not a game, you know
1999 Aug 27Googlehimmel (Pathetic Science)Is it so? Have you not heard?
1999 Aug 30Tarantula Flakes Ripped my EarlobeWhat is the point if one lacks the finish ?

September
1999 Sep 6Hugo Onerous (Episode1)Where, oh where is the Phantom Menace
1999 Sep 7Renaissance Dental Imperfections GalleryAll right he said, I think I will
1999 Sep 13Explorers from FutilityThe 'Big Adventure' all began on a day of trepidation
1999 Sep 23Anathema or AssonanceA Plutonian plutocracy, a demonized democracy,
1999 Sep 28Banana WapentakesHow hairy is my nose, do you suppose?

October
1999 Oct 11Blessed, Blessed, this Momenteum of the MorningI told him that he shouldn't hoard the family's only Oiuja board
1999 Oct 14Ahab Still Got Those Almighty Moonshine BluesAll dressed up and nowhere to go
***1999 Oct 16The Knight who Rode a Goat to BarcelonaBefore the porcupine descends
1999 Oct 23Beneath the Dismembering SkyWhen Ethelred beheld the axolotl
1999 Oct 25Map of the Primitive SongSleep, curly savage, on the forest floor.

November
***1999 Nov 1Over-baked blossomNow listen, please. I've brought you here
1999 Nov 3Implausible Emptiness in Andromeda ParkwayWithout denying anything much
1999 Nov 9To Bypass Cartesian NotationLot Seventeen: two lightweight combs
1999 Nov 12Fermenting the Woman from the SurgeryAchilles stole my hobby-horse
1999 Nov 16Billericay notwithstanding ...Thus it remains, and the remainder thus
1999 Nov 17Corking the Windswept WolvesWhen I consider ............ no, I can't go on
1999 Nov 18Bunuel, Masterly EngineerI skipped among the parsley beds
1999 Nov 18SudsThe main thing to remember about hunting with a fish
1999 Nov 23The Herrings' Adieu (Striding Akimbo)Mortar, crust of lies
1999 Nov 26Bottle UpSpoons are the one thing God forgot
1999 Nov 30Under the auspices of the Mesopotamian tube-station in EppingIn a distant land called Pernia there ruled a mighty Peach

December
1999 Dec 1One Blonde Speaking After SilenceLike fish, attracted to a flame
***1999 Dec 1Stacy's Fading CardiganThe autumn leaves
1999 Dec 7Mythical PiscatorI talk to herring in the dark when no one is around
1999 Dec 14Thinking AllowedI think that I shall never see
1999 Dec 14Screaming by RoteA random collection of words
1999 Dec 16Claudius Jointless, Claudius PointlessThe other day I found a paper clip
1999 Dec 16Bothering Without EtiquetteGive me back my luncheon-meat!
1999 Dec 19On Heat For MonthsAway! Here's neither inn nor manger
1999 Dec 23Hail Noddy!Something whispers in my ear
1999 Dec 24Worse Shame Than Coal-Shovelling TendenciesUncertain and yet, somehow, sure
1999 Dec 24Subtle, Said the MaggotsSpent moons bestrew th'empyrean
***1999 Dec 24You'll be a Laughing-stock TomorrowAt this festive, glowing season
1999 Dec 26The Equilibrium RanklesLet's not add another word
1999 Dec 29I, EverestI hear the tread of thirty thousand men
1999 Dec 31Merlin's Legendary Lost OathsMy daughter! My daughter! the old wizard cried

This page was last modified by The Spoonmaster, April 13 2023.