The Spoonbill Generator

Why We Ought Not To Bellow Faintly Throughout Our Dinner

Betrayed by movements in the dark       [Roland ]

I thought that I would have a lark       [Apsley ]

With pale Lorenzo's spouse       [Roland ]

And so insert a mouse       [Apsley ]

Where hitherto no mouse had gone       [Chevalier ]

Save in the tales of Babylon       [Roland ]

No mouse had gone - I say it twice -       [Apsley ]

Along that passage, fit for mice       [Roland ]

In bold Lorenzo's house,       [Apsley ]

And yet that pallid louse       [Roland ]

Took umbrage at my putting in       [Apsley ]

A rodent 'neath his spouse's skin       [Roland ]

No mouse before (I three times say),       [Apsley ]

Had visited in such a way       [Roland ]

The proud Lorenzo's wife       [Apsley ]

And thus he lost his life       [Roland ]

In finding justly no way out       [Apsley ]

Despite his whiskers and his snout       [Roland ]

Ans so poor mousie met his fate       [Chevalier ]

On his very first date       [Roland ]

Poor mouse, so bold to please a wench!       [Apsley ]

Enduring the unwholesome stench       [Roland ]

Of prawns all in a row!       [Apsley ]

Since Pale Lorenzo kept, on show       [Roland ]

For those who might enjoy its ease,       [Apsley ]

No end of items such as these       [Roland ]

Poor mouse, immured in fleshy purse!       [Apsley ]

The only well-known fate that's worse       [Roland ]

Is that of Aesop's frog       [Chevalier ]

Which, trampled on a morning jog       [Roland ]

One night, decayed in instants three       [Apsley ]

Lorenzo sang his threnody       [Roland ]

Thou Mouse of Lust!       [Apsley ]

Forever cuss'd!       [Roland ]

That enter'd in       [Apsley ]

Thou Mouse of Sin!       [Roland ]

Begone to Hell!       [Apsley ]

Begone to Hell!       [(trad) ]

Begone, I say,       [Apsley ]

To Hell!       [(trad) ]

Lorenzo knew no stronger curse,       [Apsley ]

But kept on shouting (which is worse)       [Roland ]

Begone to Hell!       [Apsley ]

Begone to Hell!       [(trad) ]

Begone, I say,       [Apsley ]

To Hell!       [(trad) ]

Contributors: Roland, Apsley, Chevalier, (trad).
Poem finished: 23rd August 2005 by Chevalier.