The Spoonbill Generator

Contactual Precautions and Unbecoming Curses

You must, when adding cream to recipes [F]

Make sure you wear a safety hat [Padfoot]

Or slip, you might, o'er towering precipice [snood]

And honestly, you don't need that [Grayman]

You must, when making papier maché [Ethetran]

Put on your hi-vis yellow vest [snood]

Keep careful watch on each glue sachet [Ethetran]

Yes, honestly, it's for the best [Beefy ]

You must, when trimming pesky nose hairs [Dassn't Say]

Be careful with the garden shears [Beefy ]

Or you might snip the heads off passing soldiers [fester]

And, honestly, you'll lose your ears [Beefy ]

You must, when cleaning out a tortoiseshell [Padfoot]

Consult the shell's incumbent [snood]

Or else you'll land in Tortoise H-E-double-toothpicks [Kansas Sam]

Sam, I think we all know what you meant. [Karin]

You must, when making nerdy jokes [snood]

Laugh at jokes your co-nerds tell [Kansas Sam]

It might be helpful to take a few tokes [Karin]

And honestly! what's that smell? [snood]

You must, when hiding from the thought police [Beefy ]

Take a sec to clear your head [Kansas Sam]

Be sure to suppress those thoughts 'bout your niece [Karin]

His niece? Honestly? So he said! [Beefy ]

Contributors: F, Padfoot, snood, Grayman, Ethetran, Beefy, Dassn't Say, fester, Kansas Sam, Karin.
Poem finished: 30th September 2003.