The Spoonbill Generator

Strange Bits Of Filth

Kansas Sam's brain overheated [Fatty]

Thank God for the spare in the trunk [Ethetran]

Though it needs its synapses treated [fester]

It's easily done while he's drunk [Beefy]

Kansas Sam keeps on falling over [fester]

(He's running on Windows NT) [ellie]

The Prestone he guzzles, moreover, [Kansas Sam]

Just makes him yearn for a pee [ellie]

Kansas Sam's re-booted daily [fester]

Yet blue-screens still dance in his head [Anon.]

He's in love with a server called Hailey [ellie]

Her drive bay he'd like to embed [Kansas Sam]

Kansas Sam's caught that new virus [Ethetran]

(So-Big's what he wanted to be) [Anon.]

He's backed up his thoughts on papyrus [Ethetran]

(His floppy disk's too small, you see...) [fester]

Kansas Sam's operation's illegal [Beefy]

Except in the Netherlands, where [Ethetran]

Sex with a server (or beagle) [fester]

Is neither forbidden nor rare [Ethetran]

Kansas Sam's going to Holland [fester]

Where the age of consent for PCs [Ethetran]

Was recently lowered to one and [fester]

a half, or six months for just a striptease [ellie]

Kansas Sam's very excited [fester]

His hard drive is now aptly named [Kansas Sam]

and his motherboard is delighted [Anon.]

(You'd think she'd be rather ashamed) [fester]

(You'd think she'd be rather ashamed) [(trad)]

Kansas Sam needs a partition [Beefy]

To keep his drive clean in her bay [Kansas Sam]

And then when he comes to fruition [F]

Hardware in software, it's better that way [smrytpnts]

Kansas Sam has a re-writer [dok]

40x24x40x, I think [smrtypnts]

His discs are etched cleaner and brighter [dok]

Than a freshly zamboni'd ice rink [Ethetran]


Contributors: Fatty, Ethetran, fester, Beefy, ellie, Kansas Sam, Anon., (trad), F, smrytpnts, dok, smrtypnts.
Poem finished: 19th September 2003.