The Spoonbill Generator

No Parsley for Matilda's Fruitcake

By chance, are you going my way? [Stacy]

No way, cos you stink of hay! [The Agent Apsley]

But you may accompany me [Roland]

Whilst I finds a place to pee [W.M. Fisher]

By chance, there's an excellent spot [TG]

Which the walrus completely forgot; [The Agent Apsley]

But you are not welcome at all [Roland]

The carpenter was there at The Fall [kd]

By chance, I've a fish up my nose, [The Agent Apsley]

Which helps to placate all my foes [Roland]

But it can't do a thing for my cold, [Stacy]

Or the knights who are old but not bold. [The Agent Apsley]

By chance, have you spied my ferret? [Capt. B.Fart]

It has no particular merit [Roland]

I guess that you can lick my glove [Willie Boy]

Since it's the one garment I love [Loaf]

By chance, have you scuttled the sloop? [The Agent Apsley]

If not, would you please pass the soup [TG]

I like it with crumpets and jam, [Stacy]

Sip and nibble on the tram. [Capt. B. Fart]

By chance all our lives are enthralled [TG]

With the text of the Biblical scrawl, [Stacy]

And yet we are dullards and fools [Roland]

We try to apply the book's rules. [Stacy]


Contributors: Stacy, The Agent Apsley, Roland, W.M. Fisher, TG, kd, Capt. B.Fart, Willie Boy, Loaf, Capt. B. Fart.
Poem finished: 9th March 1998.