The Spoonbill Generator

Requisite Tragedy

Christopher Robin was captured by those [P]

Sundry temptations to which flesh is heir [TG]

Tiny caresses to earlobes and nose [Roland]

Or big hugs of an eponymous bear [The Agent Apsley]

Christopher Robin was tortured by some [P]

But not by the ones who quite cared, [Stacy]

And not by the ones who were nameless and numb [Roland]

Of whom he was dolefully scared [The Agent Apsley]

Christopher Robin was worried by mice [GED]

Which would assail him with regular ease [The Agent Apsley]

Teasing his trousers apart in a trice [Roland]

So's they would flap in the breeze. [Stacy]

Christopher Robin was troubled by thoughts [P]

His grip on reality vague, [Stacy]

He waved to the preachers in various ports [Roland]

But avoided the blustery Hague. [Stacy]

Christopher Robin was cursed with a fate [P]

That visits us all, high and low [Roland]

He belches quite loudly and dips his hat proudly, [Stacy]

A sign that he's just --- well, you know [TG]

Christopher Robin was aghast by the state, [Stacy]

His call to the throne premature [Roland]

Chris wasn't a ruler 'cause his father was cooler, [Stacy]

(he lived in a fridge in the Ruhr) [Roland]

Christopher Robin was prudish and ill, [Stacy]

His colour alarmingly puce [TG]

Forsaken by passion he quickly turned ashen [Roland]

No, wait! It was only a ruse! [Stacy]

Christopher Robin sits halfway upstairs [TG]

And simpers to heaven-knows-whom [Roland]

He might be a tinker or a scrupulous thinker, [Stacy]

But I wish he'd go into his room! [Roland]

Christopher Robin's a toff to his boots, [The Agent Apsley]

A toff to the roots of his hair [Roland]

He lives in an attic, quite aristocratic [TG]

But oh! How I wish he'd stay there! [Roland]

Contributors: P, TG, Roland, The Agent Apsley, Stacy, GED.
Poem finished: 29th November 1997.