I've worked down the mines since father died
With friends that I thought I could trust
I've lived fourteen years with two wives by my side
It deepened, not sated, my lust

A third girl now I must acquire
I shall become a 3string liar.
My rival's presence clouds my brain
But still 2 problems must remain

I must destroy my rival, while keeping both my wives
And ensuring that my lovelife with that little callgirl thrives
I'll blow him into pieces, and I'll keep them both at ease
While transferring my attention to the woman that I please

My father kept a timebomb shop the other side of town
The softlyhissing streetcar took me through the streets and down
To where the timebomb factory ticks out the ebbing day
I took my whole lifesavings as wherewithal to pay.

I bought the clockwork casing to augment my TNT
The mechanism cost a lot 'twas made in Coventry.
I'll take it to the Gasworks dance, my rival will be there
My tension won't be verbalised 'twill shoot him through the air!

I'll blow them all to kingdom come
And I shall live in easy bliss
And ne'er confess what I have done
They'll never get me blamed for this