The Spoonbill Generator

Pop Goes My Rotten Hamster

A dozen spindly orphans       [olaf ]

Caught me by the throat       [Apsley ]

Disputing my entitlement       [olaf ]

To prepossess a groat       [Apsley ]

And, from a splintered casement       [olaf ]

Hard by old Hal's yard,       [Apsley ]

Esme flung endorphins       [olaf ]

In honour of the Bard       [Chevalier ]

Breughel jotted visions       [Apsley ]

Defacing bales of jute       [olaf ]

But never did the wharfinger       [Chevalier ]

Mistake him for Canute       [olaf ]

For none else he took him       [Apsley ]

Except at dark of night       [Chevalier ]

When commonsense forsook him       [olaf ]

And bleakness plagued his sight       [Apsley ]

As Esme tied the painter       [olaf ]

Of the ruined bark       [Apsley ]

While Breughel, growing fainter       [olaf ]

Still, settled down to shark       [Apsley ]

Meanwhile, the ragged orphans       [Chevalier ]

Seized me by the pump       [olaf ]

(A place in which endorphins       [Apsley ]

Irradiate one's rump       [olaf ]

And Esme once wrote postcards       [Apsley ]

Despatched from Ancient Rome       [olaf ]

Where potters make the most shards)       [Apsley ]

Whose spigot gleams with chrome       [olaf ]

The pump was not for turning:       [Apsley ]

"No turning!" read the sign       [Chevalier ]

As all the orphans, burning,       [Apsley ]

Cry out for turpentine       [olaf ]

Old Hal, in case you wondered,       [Chevalier ]

Seldom left his yard -       [Apsley ]

To stop its being plundered       [olaf ]

Sometimes, life is hard       [Chevalier ]

The orphans, then a-blazing,       [Apsley ]

Turned all the sea to steam       [olaf ]

The which, though quite amazing,       [Chevalier ]

Was all in Breughel's scheme       [olaf ]

So Breughel, Hal and Esme       [Chevalier ]

(Those sparks as bright as night)       [Apsley ]

Shut tight as 'Open Sesame'       [olaf ]

Set all the world aright       [Chevalier ]

Contributors: olaf, Apsley, Chevalier.
Poem finished: 11th April 2007 by Apsley.