The Spoonbill Generator

The Giant Eyes Of Friendship

Don't take offence at what I say, [Apsley]

But I really can't abide your sis [F]

Course, she's not half as bad as your Mum. I mean c'mon, what is up with that? [Karin]

Save that I utter these things in Swedish, which you don't speak. [Apsley]

But I'm really good at telepathy and picking up 'vibes.' [F]

Don't take this the wrong way [Beefy ]

But the sight of you turns my stomach [Karin]

I mean that in the nicest possible way; I mean, I am your friend after all! [Grayman]

But what are friends for, if not to tell it, literally, warts and all [Beefy ]

Speaking of warts, your nose has one; It goes with your fat face and piggy eyes [Randy]

Don't take the following personally [asdf]

But you do need to use deodorant [F]

Not that offensive odours don't have their uses sometimes, in the wild [Beefy ]

And can't be helped down at the pig farm on a hot afternoon [Grayman]

But in an office, you constitute an environmental hazard [Beefy ]

Don't take what I'm going to tell you to heart [Karin]

But your flatulence is truly butyric [Kansas Sam]

And if you don't know what that means, look it up in the dictionary [F]

Although you still won't understand, 'cause you're that thick [Grayman]

Where are you going? What did I say? [Beefy ]

Contributors: Apsley, F, Karin, Beefy, Grayman, Randy, asdf, Kansas Sam.
Poem finished: 8th January 2004 by Karin.