The Spoonbill Generator

Apsley's Painful Direction

Arabella Spommit and her shapely cousins three [P]

Kept lesser spotted woodpeckers as pets and fed them Brie. [E Greejius]

But circumstances caused a change to Philadelphia Lite [Grayman]

And a consequential rift in the domestic lute (tee-hee!) [E Greejius]

Lubricia the optician was a thrifty ne'er-do-well [The Agent Apsley]

She never ever cleaned (until she couldn't stand the smell) [Grayman]

Which led her to the slaughter as a lamb that knew no good [The Agent Apsley]

And caused no little trouble for the Viking god of Hell [TG]

Aloysius Abercrombie and his band of merry men [KT]

Were bent upon the noble art of paper upon pen [The Agent Apsley]

But origam-calligraphy was clearly not the thing [KT]

As every time they tried, the biro snapped in half again [Grayman]

An ancient condominium's the dominion of the free [j]

As long as it stands guarded by a single hawthorn tree [TG]

In which a rook is roosting with a rusty wooden leg [The Agent Apsley]

It's safe to go inside and burn another log for tea [TG]

Arabella Spommit and her shapely cousins three [P]

Were lunatic as anything, as anyone could see. [KT]

She sold them to a hypnotist for him to vent his lust: [The Agent Apsley]

Now she devotes her whole endeavours to the love of me. [P]

Contributors: P, E Greejius, Grayman, The Agent Apsley, TG, KT, j.
Poem finished: 29th February 2000.