The Spoonbill Generator

Banana Wapentakes

How hairy is my nose, do you suppose? [Canon Golightly]

Long as those protruding through my pantyhose? [Teresa Incognita]

Or are they longer than my shaggy clothes? [Desert Heat]

What I'm going to do with them God only knows [Teresa Incognita]

How dimply are my thighs, don't tell me lies! [gingersnap]

And even worse, what if each dimple multiplies? [Teresa Incognita]

Or even grows gargantuan in size? [Grayman]

I really wish I did not eat all the pies [El Tel]

How knobby are my knees, be honest please? [Teresa Incognita]

Do they resemble hives of torpid bees? [TG]

At least they're shapely in my fantasies [Teresa Incognita]

Alhtough they're ghastly in my memories. [D P D]

How frizzy is my hair, my great despair? [Grayman]

I should not have electricuted myself for a dare [El Tel]

Or put rancid mucus in my underwear [The Agent Apsley]

Now I have an air of Garfunkelesque laissez-faire [Teresa Incognita]

How baffled is my brain, am I quite sane? [TG]

Is it a bad sign that thinking causes pain? [Teresa Incognita]

Should I take drastic measures or refrain? [Grayman]

Oh, hang it all, I'm off to seek the sun in Spain [TG]

How stinky are my feet (although petite)? [Teresa Incognita]

Does anyone find their malodorous odor sweet [Del Playa Debaucher]

Or regard their de-shoeing as a treat? [Grayman]

What haunting notes do miss a beat! [The Agent Apsley]

How tortured is my soul, if that's your goal, [Teresa Incognita]

Does there exist a deeper, blacker hole? [TG]

From which to extract Dante's mole [El Tel]

Or play a yet more sinister role [Grayman]

How swollen is my liver? I'm all a-quiver [TG]

With aches that make The Blind Man shiver; [The Agent Apsley]

But they say that life is for the liver [Grayman]

So let's go now over the river [Jonas Zimmermann]

My body isn't quite my sole delight [Grayman]

Though it seems so in the dark of night [TG]

And with my slowly fading sight [P]

I long only for death's sweet respite. [Elizabeth]

Contributors: Canon Golightly, Teresa Incognita, Desert Heat, gingersnap, Grayman, El Tel, TG, D P D, The Agent Apsley, Del Playa Debaucher, Jonas Zimmermann, P, Elizabeth.
Poem finished: 28th September 1999.